Coming to the realization that we all process and react to things differently is probably the HARDEST most simple thing to do...lol That statement probably made no sense but let me explain. It is easy to say that you understand that we are all different and that we all express, love, speak, and act within our own ways but when someone actually exercises that right to be daringly different we are shocked. We are shocked because maybe our moral standards are different? Maybe our expressions or how we wish to receive love are not aligned...
It's shocking because how dare someone think and/or react differently from us. Many of us cannot see the logic behind it. I have experienced this. I often run into people who aren't as far on their journey as I am or are further in theirs than I am and it used to be hard for me to comprehend their actions. I have learned that the moment we accept our differences and begin to realize that where there is no expectation there is no disappointment we can truly live in peace. The most important people for us to be patient with when it comes to differences are those we love. Take your significant other for example, whether it be boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, or life partner...they give and receive love differently. I am sure that there are aspects of their love that is different from yours but as their partner you are to nurture them and try your best to understand their expression of love as they should also do for you.
I want to share a book that has helped me understand this concept of Love Languages. The book is titled, The 5 Love Languages | The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman. It teaches of a very simple concept. Love is necessary and it begins at home. So, it is imperative that we make an effort to understand the person in which we wish to build a home and life with. Those behaviors will trickle down to your children. I honestly believe that the lack of understanding love and why it is important is why we have so many broken families, so many people who are troubled, etc. We should aim to build love that lasts. Love that goes beyond the wedding and the honeymoon. Chapman sets us up to fully understand and achieve this goal. He lists the 5 Love Languages as the following:
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
I won't give away too much of the book because I want you all to actually read it. The listed love languages, once explained in depth are truly relevant to each and every one of us. Once you read this book you may find out that there are aspects of all 5 love languages that pertain to you but there will always be one that is heightened. That is your primary love language. We can understand our spouses, our children, and our friends much better by understanding what their primary love language is. This book was a page turner because it opened my eyes and lit so many lightbulbs in my mind. You can pick it up at B&N.com or Amazon.com. Enjoy Bookworms!! :)